Wednesday, December 31, 2008


Dear Kids, an over-glorified, failed economist once said that "the history of the world is the history of class struggle."

That's bull.

The history of the world is the history of PERSONAL struggles: Bush vs. Saddam, Aquino vs. Marcos, etc. These personal conflicts tend to involve the people around the main protagonists. When they spiral out of control, there will be murders (which go by another name: WAR). If you really think about it, all wars had petty beginnings. Heck, the Trojan war could have been averted had Agammemnon laid off drinking too much so that he could become a great lay to Helen instead.

All wars start with HATE. Brothers and sisters are not immune to this.

After we flew our kites last December 27, Your Lola Letty received a text message from her relatives informing her that her Older Sister (Your Lola Rita) passed away. Since your Mom is still recuperating from her stay at the Hospital, I decided to make the trip to Hondagua with her for the wake. Sabine and Sage came along.

Your Lola Rita got involved in a personal dispute with her other Sister (not your Lola Letty.) They didn't talk for a long time. This was only broken when her sister visited her when she was practically in her deathbed a few months before she died. They talked as if nothing bitter happened between them. Hatred, Anger, Pettiness were forgotten.

During the wake, we stayed only for one night and I insisted on going back the following day since your Mom and Tristan still need us back home. The following morning, before leaving, I found out that Lola Rita's Brother-in-law was coming to accompany his wife (the sister Your Lola Rita just made up with a few months back). I was worried that years of pent up emotions might explode violently between blood relatives (hey, afterall, the Palestinian Intefadah is in the news again. Isn't it just a dispute between Palestinian and Israeli Brothers?). I had to stay to help stop the bloodshed.

I was there when the sons of your Lola Rita embraced their estranged Uncle. I saw former enemies, grown men, shedding tears, asking each other for forgiveness. The scene was too much for me-- The concept of "Forgiveness" is also foreign to me. I excused myself and went to the dining table where your Lola and Ninang Di were watching the scene from a distance. To disguise the redness in my eyes I deliberately chewed on a flaming red siling labuyo. Then I eyed those two on the dining table as they watched the intimate scene. It dawned on me that Your Lola and Ninang have been teaching me, since last Christmas eve, that forgiveness is always possible. As if both of them are telling me that I should learn to forgive that one person who has been responsible for my all consuming rage this year.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

College of the Immaculate Conception Alumni Homecoming

Sorry Y'all, I can't come. But Noel will be there and Ate is the PRO. Hope you all have fun!

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
how did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey’s head?

This is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin’ out

This is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
Criminal record says I broke in twice
I must’ve done it half a dozen times

I wonder if it’s too late
Should I go back and try to graduate?
Life’s better now than it was back then
If I was them, I wouldn’t let me in
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye


Remember the old arcade
Blew every dollar that we ever made
The cops see us hanging out
They said somebody went and burned it down

We used to listen to the radio
And sing along with every song we know
We said someday we’d find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel

Kim's the first girl I kissed
I was so nervous that I nearly missed
She’s had a couple of kids since then
I haven’t seen her since God knows when
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on the bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

I miss that town
I miss the faces
You can't erase
You can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it

If I could relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me...

Friday, December 26, 2008

Kite Flying Days (December 26-27)

Dear God

for a man who ages ago used to spend his christmases unhappy, unloved, alone, you made this Christ mas very special. It's a gift. An undeserved gift. Thank you for remaining faithful to me though I haven't been faithful in keeping the religious faith through out my life.

Thank you very much!

Merci beaucoup, Mon Dieu! tres beaucoup!

The ATEs

Monday, December 22, 2008

Dear Tristan

These are some of my wishes for you and your sisters:

May you be surrounded by overwhelming love all your life...
May you have every gift, especially length of years...

Tristan, May you see the breathtaking beauty in every woman's eyes.
and may you find the one who will keep you in her heart... as you
keep her safe in your arms, never let yourself hurt her.

Friday, December 19, 2008


DECEMBER 15, 2008 (3:50 P.M.)

"Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes, begin to pray.
Then tears of joy stream down my face.
With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything.
With arms wide open
With arms wide open
Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath,
I'll take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life.
With arms wide open,
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
With arms wide open
I'll show you everything
...oh yeah
With arms wide open
..wide open..."

--With Arms Wide Open by Creed

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Bella Swan

Dear Tristan, I read a quarter of the book "Twilight" while Ate Sage and I were in powerbooks. I also skipped some pages and ended up halfway through it.

While reading I couldn't help but have this mental image of Ms. Swan.

A few months back, while meeting with Grand Dy's Accountant, this petite beauty passed by wearing a modest gown and a beautiful smile (she smiled at everyone.) I smiled back when she looked my way.
I thought she looked familiar (probably a men's magazine model or a TV personality).

Then I found in my inbox this picture from a friend with incurable juvenile predilections. I immediately recognized her.

The photo on the left did not do her any justice-- so did the other accompanying, compromising pictures. My guess is they were taken by an ex-boyfriend and was spread around to get back at her for dumping him. Her Ex, or whoever spread this around, makes me want to wish that there is indeed a hell as described in Dante, or Jessica Zafra's book so that he could spend eternity looking at the naked picture of his extremely deficient package plastered on every wall, Billboard, including PC wall papers, being gawked at and ridiculed by every one in hades and beyond.

No girl deserves to be treated that way. She has a very angelic face that it just feels so wrong to know that sometime, somewhere, she made a mistake and that she has to live with the pain forever.

I guess thinking of her as Bella while reading that book was my way of making things right for her in my own humble way. Because every girl deserves to be treated the way Edward (the protagonist) worships Bella in that book.

Lyrics | Linkin Park - Leave Out All The Rest lyrics

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Pacquiao: Against All Odds

"And you coming back to me
is against all odds
it's the chance I've got to take..."

Dear Kids, Who would have thought that he'd win the fight convincingly? Not me. I actually prayed that he won't get hurt too much. I figured Oscar can only lose if the businessman part of his brain clicks and he takes a fall to set up a rematch with a bigger purse. I must have over-prayed too much (I'm kidding).

I watched the fight on the silver screen with Dad and your Ninong Noey. I cautioned them not to get their hopes too high. Dad even said that we could be watching Manny's funeral. I figured, "what the heck, it's gonna be my first time to watch a fight with a crowd so I shouldn't let this opportunity pass."

While in the queue for a ticket, I noticed that everything in the cinema complex makes your testosterone level pump higher. The deodorant sponsors of the fight brought in skimpilly clad models distributing their products. Because of the macho atmosphere I felt like spoiling for a fight too when the burly guy in the snack counter asked for a smaller bill from me and made a snide remark that made my grip on the soda can really, really tight. I guess he noticed my grip and imagined it colliding with his face. so he just shut up and gave me my change which he counted carefully as he averted my murderous stare.

There are so many things going against Manny Pacquiao. I'll let the experts elaborate. He came into the fight as an underdog. That status didn't last long. Especially when we noticed Oscar closely talking to Pacquiao's gloves-- and nodding in agreement to whatever it is telling him. That was just the first round.

By the 7th round, when Manny caught the golden boy in the corner several times, I was already shouting "No mas, No mas!" in a vain attempt to stop the bloodbath (In the other welterweight title bout of my youth, I remember Roberto Duran shouting those same words when he decided to prematurely end his fight with Sugar Ray Leonard after getting out-classed for several rounds).

Nobody thought Pacquiao would win. Right after the match, I overheard the chick beside me and her boylet ruing the fact that they did not bet any money on Manny. And while making the beeline for the john, some guy was cheerfully talking with somebody on his phone telling him that he lost a thousand bucks because he placed his bet on Dela Hoya. That he was grinning from ear to ear was a clear sign that Manny's win made his being a stupid gambler forgiveable.

When the fight was over, Dela Hoya looked even uglier than king kong Manny. I couldn't help but say "Nice Job, Manny." It's one win for the Ugly Men of the world like me (and the ones reading this blog. umamin ka na Snglguy) against the Good looking golden boys who always get the girls. As I've said in the beginning of this entry, the place was full of Testosterone pumping decorations, but the organizers forgot one detail that was clearly, inappropriately present. When I looked up the ceiling I saw posters of the movie "Twilight" festooned all around the area-- It's A movie featuring a fictional character that will make the girls of all generations swoon. A character that no mortal guy could possibly compete against. Maybe Manny should forget about welterweight champion Hatton and concentrate instead on rearranging the face of that guy who played the lead character in Twilight: Edward Cullen.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Sweet Science

Dear Tristan, Today could be your Birthday, Son. But just in case You decide to choose a date later than Pearl Harbor day, your Mom and I will be spending the day watching the fight between Dela Hoya and Pacquiao.

Just in case Dela Hoya decides to give it his best, I just pray that Pacquiao doesn’t get a career ending injury. Because it’s obvious that Pacquiao can not possibly win without Oscar taking a fall or selling out the fight. Dela Hoya is a shrewd businessman. A rematch can earn them even bigger purses.

But I don’t think Oscar is cheap. He will be a handful. And Pacquiao is in for the fight of his life.

And despite of the fact that he is destined to lose, I will be cheering for him just like all the other suckers out there. Because he will be facing overwhelming odds. But after this fight, I’ll be rooting for Pacquiao's next opponents.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008


Dear Sabine, while Sadie and I were surfing YouTube for Chris Daughtry songs, you begged to listen to the Disney Song "Connected" from the Diamond Castle Movie. When the list of videos popped out, I was surprised when you didn't choose the ones with the cartoon characters on it but instead you pointed at the one with Katherine McPhee.

Monday, December 01, 2008

Windsurfing Moves

Dear Sabine, Yesterday, we went to the grocery. I noticed you hanging on to the side of the cart since you are too big to sit on the slot for toddlers. your daredevil moves reminded me of windsurfers.

Since it's December 1 today,  I made an attempt this morning to look like santa claus. I ended up looking like Hemingway instead.

Letters to my kids about their childhood adventures

To Sage, Sabe, Sade & 3Stan

To Sage, Sabe, Sade & 3Stan